So, that was one heck of a positive message, that last one, wasn’t it, huh? Well, I guess there’s certainly a reason why I put “Drama” in my blog’s title. But drastic times call for drastic measures – and I’m planning on some drastic changes to how I handle this site and my roleplay-gaming activities altogether. Just let me pick up that low note I ended up on last time.

There’s only going up from now

I came, at long last, to accept how I’m wired and what that means for me. Just for the record – RPGs weren’t the most important or impactful area in which I had to do so. But they were somewhat catalytic. When something I thought was sort of a “last stand” of my peace and quiet turned out to be yet another energy drain, I saw the scale of what I was dealing with. Well, I still am. That means also, however, that whatever I do now, I’m probably going to do better – and I’m not trying random guesses here. But I wanted to add just one more – very positive, I promise – piece of context here first.

I hope at least some of you caught that subtle (was it, really?) allusion to J.R.R. Tolkien’s famous essay, “Beowulf: The Monster and the Critics”, with my previous article’s title. It is how I feel some of these days: an overstimulated beast, “maddened by the sound of harps”. And not only harps, but almost every sound and light. Sometimes, it’s a bit easier, and some days – their count slowly going up – I even enjoy a good, tranquil evening.

That other “Drama”

I guess the grandest of my dreams related to storytelling and engaging with RPGs is to take part in fully emerging in – and expanding upon – Tolkien’s “Legendarium”. I found it coming back in many conversations about The One Ring, Adventures in Middle-earth, and other “LotR-RPGs” – that trying to create upon the original literary foundations of the Lord of the Rings, Silmarillion – or even Hobbit (yeah, I did that on purpose) – is somehow doomed to fail or aesthetically (if not ethically) questionable. But I think that really depends on how you do that. More importantly, though, even the author himself wanted to make room for that when he was just setting out to write the first parts of his Middle-earth works.

I would draw some of the great tales in fullness, and leave many only placed in the scheme, and sketched. The cycles should be linked to a majestic whole, and yet leave scope for other minds and hands, wielding paint and music and drama.

Letter to Milton Waldman, 1951 (“Letter No. 131”) in: H. Carpenter (Ed.), “The Letters of J.R.R. Tolkien”

I guess I’m writing much in the spirit of the Professor, with my inner critic already gnawing at me. Because Tolkien himself appended one more word to that paragraph above.

Absurd.

He concluded.
But I do feel like I am “wielding drama” while crafting scenarios for my One Ring games. And that’s what I’m going to aim at full-in from now on – not just homebrewing for my own use, but one day, perhaps, I’m gonna publish some official TOR materials. Yeah, I know – Absurd – but I’m really fed up with self-pity and taking my time. By the way, if you’re a Free League’s editor reading this, feel free to reach out. ????

One Does Not Simply Cope

Clearly, I’m not going to make myself a publisher in one step (unless I get an e-mail from that link above). Knowing that I’m also working with a bit of a plan here. But I also want to get back to my starting point.

Last time, I told you how I process and cope with my non-standard wiring. One of the key strategies was immersing in various stories, telling and re-telling them. But I can’t manage to run RPGs for now – in the manner I used to, anyway. So writing and publishing my stories as scenarios seems like a natural extension of that storytelling strategy.

And my, oh my!, do I have some good stories in stock! My cloud drive is actually overflowing with write-ups, drats, and outlines. But let me just tie up my unfinished blog stories first. Then, I’ll get you on a few new routes of making a whole spectrum (if you know, you know) of scenarios!

Meanwhile, I wonder how many of you reading this can relate to my struggles and strategies to cope with them. I know that talking openly about that can be very helpful, so don’t hesitate to reach out by clicking my pic at the homesite’s top. Or leave a comment below – if you’re brave enough!

A.